Maters! Maters! Gitchyur tantalizingly tasty rich’n ripenly red maters right here, folks! A farmer-type client once asked me if I could produce some package imagery for his budding tomato(e) endeavor. As a nod to the peach-crate labels of California yore, what was received for his nominal investment was the label thingy you see glowing before you. Shiny, plump and juicy globes of salsa-bearing goodness, just waiting to be scarfed up by some hungry tex-mex diners on a patio near you. Or more accurately, near me – as for all I know, you may be looking at this on a snowy mid-January day in Milwaukee. In which case, I am indeed woeful for your predicament.
Old McDavid as I like to call him – he wasn’t that old actually, but it did give me the opportunity to hum that catchy little tune that made him consistently cringe – was happy with his quarry with the exception that he noted I had depicted his cows merrily munching away after having obviously tromped across his cash crop. I pointed out that his good fortune lied in the fact that they were obviously bovines of sound judgement, having not indeed devoured said crop in favor of the greener grass on the other side.
And, that much to the cows’ credit – they were probably familiar with the generous amount of pesticides needed to generate good produce in this climate, thus saving Old McDavid’s crop and even his livestock from certain peril. He promptly smiled and paid up.